A new year and what that entails

In two days its 2014. 

Time is flying by soooo stinkin' fast!

I start the University in a little over two weeks and I can't wait!

I'm already focusing on my art and coming up with new ideas and sketches, and can't wait until classes start so I can get more done and start building/creating. I won't be taking ceramics this semester which is kinda sad, but I'll have to compensate in my sculpture and b&w photog classes for artistic release ;) 

I'm totally submitting five sculpture pieces for a Sustainability Art Show being put on at the UA this spring. Here is hoping my pieces are what they are looking for. I realized I have a niche with my artwork... Out of the 15 or so pieces I have that are portfolio worthy, 1/3 of them easily fit into the food/sustainability/be kind to the earth realm. Lol. It's like I have a passion for all things food or something?! I had three pieces photographed today and when I get the images I'll post what I'm submitting. Yay for making art!!!

Along with making more art, I'm going to continue this new year focusing on downsizing to simple, basic, essentials in my home and life more. I'm going to go the route of bus and bike for school this year too instead of driving Coug (my little car) around. It just makes sense that with my growing passion for reverence and love for the earth and people on it, I should try to help keep it beautiful in whatever small way I can.  

With that thought process I'll be moving from apartment living (YAY!!!) and going for a house where I can garden and have me some chickens! Woot! Woot! It'll happen in May if not sooner. I got to go on an awesome chicken coop tour sponsored by the co-op that got me even more excited about chickens and gardening. I didn't know getting more excited for it was possible, but it was and I am. Haha. 

I am also going to keep volunteering with the food bank! Its so much fun and the girl that I get to help and work with is so stinkin' sweet! I'll keep helping out with the kids nutrition program and the kids/cooking demo booth at the farmers market. I find it really fulfilling to work in the community and talk to people!

I've checked out a few books this week

That I feel will help me with the goals I have set for myself in my life at the moment too!

Weekly canning and yummy food making, continuing to build homemaking skills (I want to be prepared for my ship when it happens;), working on creating gallery worthy art, and the simplification of my home and overall lifestyle. 

I'll need to also work on sewing, I'm officially in the 190's with my weight which means in the last year I've lost about 50lbs, and will need to get clothes fitting better. I've realized The Lord has blessed me with what clothes I do have now though that fit. There was a group of women in my church that we passed around bags of clothes we didn't want anymore and I got a good chunk of cute smaller sized pants and skirts that route. I have also loved being able to barter with my skills, mainly the hair doin' skills for stuff. Lol. I got my sculptures photographed and a couple cute infinity scarves that way. Bring on more bartering for other stuff too!

Worthy goals I dare say. These don't include the personal spiritual goals I have, those goals are deserving of their own post, but I truly believe these goals will work together to help me become a better person, daughter, sister, neighbor, and friend. 

Here is to making changes today!

A lesson learned from crushin'

One of the lessons I've learned during this crushin' on the Prof is that the guys I've thought I liked, I um, don't think I really liked them that much. 

I think I built the previous crushes up so much in my head as super duper amazing that I wasn't able to see the real them, ok truthfully I don't know if I wanted to see the real them. I for sure short changed them and myself for not being willing to see the real them, but it is an area I apparently need to grow and learn in. Hopefully this crush is a sign that I'm learning. Fingers crossed and prayers said. 

Don't get me wrong, I think Prof is amazing, but somehow, I've recognized his imperfections along the way as I've gotten to know him and never wanted to put him above myself. If that makes sense. I see us as equals which I've not experienced with guys I've "liked" in the past. It's been really interesting to try and figure out why I've put guys above myself while also trying to just accept that I did and move on. I haven't fine tuned the "why" yet, but I'm coming around in the accepting part quite nicely ;)

I think its funny too that previous crushes I've gone on dates with, but not with him. Its weird. I've recognized I wasn't really friends with the previous guys, they got put in the crush zone too quickly. Prof for sure got put in the "he's cute" zone at first, but not the full crush zone for a good while. I feel with time we've become friends, not the social hanging out friends yet, but the "we can talk about more personal stuff and care about what's happening in the life of the other person", kind of friends. I'm pro our kind of friendship. 

I let him know I like him, but he let me know he's not interested in dating anyone right now except himself and his art. I told him I think he's missing out because there are a lot of perks that come with dating me besides my cooking ;) but being just friends is totally cool with me. I would rather be just friends than miss out on his awesomeness. Whether there is a date in our future or not, he is still good people, and someone I highly respect. 

I will probably continue to check him out when I see him, and told him such, but there will be a whole new pool of guys to check out in my near future. Good ole UofA. Lol. I'll try and remember the lessons I've learned though and go the route of sticking with seeing the reality of a guy and building a friendship first. 

Oh Happy Day!

I got accepted into the art school!! Yeah buddy!!

I called them today since I hadn't heard anything yet. The official paper documentation will be coming in the mail next week, but they congratulated me and said I was in :) I'll take it!

New crush? Don't mind if I do.

Well ok, its not a "new" crush. I've thought this guy is pretty amazing for over a year now. I've just gotten the chance to get to know him a little more this semester. Good ole super hot, amazing art professor (read this post) I'll re-emphasize: he has never been my teacher, so liking him is ok. Haha.  I see and talk to him a couple times a week, and totally check him out... and maybe I bring him homemade food sometimes too. Don't judge. lol. 

I've learned a few things about myself during this adventure of having a crush on him, one thing is I totally eat better when I have someone to cook for (selfish? A little). I really do enjoy sharing my whole food concoctions with him, he's kinda a taste tester. He's eaten some pretty odd stuff, but so far his food critiquing vocab for my food is "really good" and "awesome"... I'll take it.  (Some of the other stuff I've learned about myself will be blogged about separately, keep an eye out)

I'll only get to check him out and bring him tasty goodness for another week though, because I finish school and won't take classes at Pima anymore come Dec 16. Sad day. 

Well maybe the big picture it's not a sad day, Im moving on to the UofA (still waiting for the actual acceptance into the program, but the art dept advisors totally let me sign up for my art classes already, so I'm kinda already in ;), and that's not sad. He also has said we will go out for lunch next semester, that's not sad either. Haha. I keep hinting we should eat sushi. I love sushi. 

Now, I hope his definition of next semester and my definition of next semester are the same, or better yet, we should define next semester as being the winter break session. I'll have to try and pass that new definition onto him ;)

I've realized we can still stay in touch though, even if I don't get to see him or bring him food anymore. There is always email. Good ole email. I really do prefer talking to him in person though, he cracks me up! I think he's witty, smart, kind, waaaay oober talented, and ridiculously attractive! His smile is my favorite. 

I like that I can be myself around him, God loving, odd commentator, funny face making, wanna be artist, foodie that I am and he's cool with that. I'm a little odd folks, but truthfully, he kinda is too. Haha. I get he's trying to be a better person in the world, and that's pretty endearing.

I like the guy, but I don't want to put him in any kind of weird predicament with work being a teacher and me being a student at the school though, because it wouldn't be fair to him. He didn't ask me to like him. It is his fault he's amazing though and his parents fault he's cute. Valid argument? I think so. Here is hoping next semester at a different school comes quickly and the sushi hints take effect. I'll keep y'all updated. 

Once I tell him about my blog, I'll give ya his name too ;) it seems only fare. Until then, what shall his nickname be? Prof? Prof it is. 

A Lesson on the Power of Love through Forgiveness

What is the greatest commandment? 

"Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind." (New Testament, Matthew, Matthew 22:37)

What is the second greatest commandment?

"Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself." (New Testament, Matthew, Matthew 22:39) 

I've learned that forgiveness is hard. 

I've learned that I couldn't let go of the hurt on my own. 

I've learned I can't say I believe in the power of the Atonement in other areas of healing and not trust in it regarding helping me to love and forgive. 

I've learned that trying to love while not being forgiving is hard. 

I've learned though, that the ability to truly forgive others and ourselves comes because of Jesus Christ and His ability to forgive each of us. 

I've learned that trying to love during the process of forgiveness was worth the peace that came into my heart. 

I've learned during these last couple months I am teachable. They have been hard lessons to learn. I cried a lot folks, but I'm learning to completely rely on my Heavenly Father, my Savior, and the Holy Ghost to refine out the 'natural man' within me because I know I can not, nor would I want to, do it alone. 

I love feeling peace and comfort, I love feeling joy, and I'm trying to make my day to day decisions based on invoking those feelings with in myself and others as much as possible. 

I've learned its a complete cycle of love. 

Love really is the answer, when we love God, we want to love our neighbor. When we feel Gods love we want to share it with our neighbor and the cycle continues. 

I. Love. Love.