Simplification

I have felt a STRONG desire in the last few months to simplify my life. I think it all started when I started to simplify my shopping and eating habits (by the way I am now down 25lbs, and still feel good about making good food choices. Woot! Woot!)

Shopping, cooking, and eating more simply has helped me realize I would like a simple, aka decluttered and more natural, life in more aspects of my daily living. Thought process is as follows: if I feel (key word encompassing spiritual, mental, and physical health) this good now, I can only imagine how good I will feel a year from now. 

What are some of these changes you may ask? They are not in any particular order, but are as follows

1/2) Sticking with simple shopping, farmers market for produce, co-op for other personal and household needs, and thrift stores for everything else. I like the relaxed shopping experiences that come with those three places. While away for the summer, I'll still try to stick with that regimine. 

.75) Guys. As my friend Megan says "go with the flow" ;) I'll try and stay simple and not be the complicated girl. (Update on Tyson, he didn't try for more dates. Which is ok, I can only guess he liked me, but not enough to want to keep pursuing getting to know me more than as a friend. He is still a great guy and is totally helping me out with family names in the temple this summer which is awesome. 

1) I am embracing all my white hair, I have a lot of them people. Going gray/white early runs in the family, but I'm pretty ok with it so far, its a nice white :) and I feel I still look my age. Haha. 

Two) I've been leaning toward more natural and simple cleaning, health, and beauty regimines. Trying to stay away from stronger chemicals in general I guess. Ive been using organic olive oil for my face moisturizer and hand lotion for awhile now :) 

III) My apartment is getting de cluttered when I get home. No joke, I'm telling myself now that I can get rid of all the things I haven't touched in months; bedroom, storage shed, and simplifying of my kitchen are in order.  

2+2) My wardrobe is in the process of a forced downsizing, Im not complaining here at all, bring on having to get smaller clothes. I want thosr smaller clothes to take up even less room in my closet though ;) I've been trying to buy more versatile clothes that can be used in multiple outfits because I like the idea of not having tons of laundry to do too. Just sayin. 

Cinco) Debt and getting out of it. The only debt I have are school loans. I'm feeling I should rock a job next semester while finishing school so I can start to pay off that debt. I should be done in December with my Associate degree, so after that I can start working more to get a good savings established too... who knows, maybe a mission is in my near future :) Wouldn't that be AHHHMAZING??!! I'll keep ya updated. 

I feel those changes folks will be really good for me. Any perspective on simplification y'all would like to share, I would love to hear/read it

 :)

Recognition and Closure

This was a very simple and very sweet learning experience that had me in awe for a few days.

What I recognized and gained closure on was this...

As long as the man I marry loves God more than he loves me all of the fears I've had, that I hadn't realized even existed, can be let go, because if he loves God more than me, he will live a life, and be true to his part as a husband and father that would fulfill and exceed the requirements allowing him to return to live with God after this mortal life is over. 

It was an "ah ha" moment that I had the fears; Not that I want to explain those fears, thats more personal than I want to be on here, but the fears sure do make complete sense once I learned about them. 

Those fears have now been let go and my heart and mind have a peace I didn't know they needed. 

I love our Heavenly Father so much! 

He is so great in His teaching moments with each of us, but I have completely learned I have to do my part to be prepared for said teaching moments by reading the scriptures, listening/reading conference talks, and listening to up lifting messages and music. 

I'll continue to try my best to be prepared for those moments, because I really like all this learning that is happening in my life at the moment. 

Quotes of Comfort

Here are a couple quotes I've come across this week that have brought me further comfort on the subject of imperfections and weaknesses-

President Monson speaking to the Young Women in April 2012, said

"I have spoken over the years with many individuals who have told me, “I have so many problems, such real concerns. I’m overwhelmed with the challenges of life. What can I do?” I have offered to them, and I now offer to you, this specific suggestion: seek heavenly guidance one day at a time. Life by the yard is hard; by the inch it’s a cinch. Each of us can be true for just one day—and then one more and then one more after that—until we’ve lived a lifetime guided by the Spirit, a lifetime close to the Lord, a lifetime of good deeds and righteousness. The Savior promised, “Look unto me, and endure to the end, and ye shall live; for unto him that endureth to the end will I give eternal life.”

This quote was in reference to being obedient, but I felt the "take one day at a time" principle is a completely appreciated perspective to overcoming those imperfections. 

Then there was the quote.

"Let someone love you just the way you are- as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. To believe that you must hide all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room"

-Marc Hack

I just love it. 

I didn't do my homework to see if it is Marc Hack (not sure exactly who that even is ;) who said it, but the words ring true. The words helped me to see where my insecurities are and what direction I need to go to find further peace in who I am. 

I really do like me, my imperfections and all, I just didn't realize I wasn't being open to the idea that other people, mainly of the male persuasion, could like me with those imperfections too. 

No joke, this had been a very eye opening couple of weeks; I really feel I'm getting to know myself better now. Maybe its that I'm getting older... Or Ive gained wisdom aka earning all my gray hairs ;), I don't know, but I like having perspective into my mind that I hadn't even thought about before. 

Through all if this I have had the blessing of coming closer to my Heavenly Father, because its He who had to hear my pleas for perspective and peace. He has answered those prayers, that I can completely attest to. God loves us and wants to help us become the best we can be, we do need to ask for help though. 

I know to become our best we have to overcome our worst and that is only possible through Jesus Christ. I know Christ loves us and wants the best for us too. I know He is the Refiner who can purify us so we can find JOY in this life and in the eternities to come. 

Life truly is amazing and what a blessing to be living. What a blessing to have joy, even when I know I'm imperfect. 

Weaknesses and Imperfections

About two weekends ago I was thinking a lot about my weaknesses and my imperfections. That Sunday was one of those days that felt like my flaws were these bright shiny neon signs flashing at me from every corner of my mind. 

It was a rough couple days. 

Thankfully it was fast Sunday, so I took the opportunity to ask for help and perspective to find peace again in my always thinking, always active mind; a mind that can help bring peace to my spirit or a mind that can foster self doubt.  

I talked with my Bishop (church leader who oversees our church family, aka "dad" role at church) about my feelings of self doubt... It wasn't necessarily what he said that brought me peace, but his words allowed the Spirit of God to bring me comfort. Comfort that its ok to be imperfect... and in my case, to be an over-thinker sometimes.  

That day the Spirit confirmed to me that we are all imperfect, that each of us has flaws and weaknesses. We each are in families with imperfect people, we will have friendships and work relationships with imperfect people. We. Are. All. Imperfect. 

I guess the main culprit for my self doubt is... Marriage, or the lack there of ;) Ive always been willing to accept the guys imperfections, but didn't realize I wasn't expecting him to accept mine. I had this unrealistic thought I had to be perfect before meeting my ore.

Thankfully I was able to recognize that day that when I get married, I'm going to marry someone just as imperfect as I am. The only perspective I'll need when that happens is... is he willing to work with me through my faults, as I work with him through his? So we can overcome our human natures and become more like Christ and be perfected in Him together. 

It was an intense learning day, and there was more!

Later on in the day a sweet confirmation of the truth came of the importance of seeing our imperfections while I was reading the Book of Mormon, the scripture is Christ speaking and says:

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them" (Book of Mormon, Ether 12:27).

WE ARE SHOWN OUR WEAKNESSES WHEN WE COME UNTO CHRIST SO WE CAN BECOME HUMBLE AND FULLY RELY ON HIS GRACE! THROUGH CHRIST OUR WEAKNESSES CAN BECOME STRENGTHS. 

What a blessing. 

This was the truth I needed to learn, it's ok I have my weaknesses and WHAT A BLESSING it is to see/know them; knowing my weaknesses means I am coming to Christ who is the only one who is able to judge those weaknesses, because it is He who carried them all. He is the only way it's possible for me to be better and overcome those weaknesses. 

I dare say I hope for the rest of my life I see my imperfections, its not easy, fun, or comfortable to see our weaknesses/imperfections, but seeing them will mean I'm heading the right direction, towards Christ, and I want that.

Well... Maybe he doesn't...

I'm having a hard time figuring out Tyson... I guess I'm just having a hard time trying to figure out if he likes me or if he is just being nice, in a "we should be friends" kind of way, because guys, he is ridiculously nice and our temple adventures and date might be his way of saying I want to be just friends. Or were enough for him to decide he wants to be just friends? I'm confused about that possibility still and our date Saturday did not help a girl to figure that out like I thought it would... 

Our date changed from a biosphere2 adventure with just the two of us into the two of us helping a family from my church who needed the extra hands to clean up their house and make it more acceptable to live in. 

It was he and I and a whole bunch of other people doing all different things around their house; we didn't get to talk much. Sad day (I've been spoiled thus far in having hours of talk time with him in our car rides and that day, I wasn't spoiled). 

Don't get me wrong we talked, he told me about his lab, and some about his research which was cool. He's a smart one! When we left we both expressed we were extremely thankful we could help that family too. 

Everything that day seemed to work out with timing (except Tyson getting to choir practice on time. Hehe)... I did tell Tyson it was a hard decision not to be selfish and just go to the Biospehere for an adventure with just us... I wish I would have explained I felt our date was rushed; I was feeling like we both kinda got jipped. Maybe he'll read this someday and learn/understand what I wasn't able to fully communicate (Hola! If you ever do read this and don't be to weirded out k? K. )

The Spirit prompted the change in plans so that should have been the first sign it was for the better, but it took me a bit to truly see it that way. I'm writing this and thinking about the day, I completely see we didn't get jipped. I can completely see the good in the day too. Blessings really do come with sacrifice, even when the initial thought of sacrificing was hard to swallow ;)

Tyson and I got to experience bringing joy and love to a grandma and three sweet little girls lives. We had the chance to truly be more Christlike. We got to see each others work ethic and how each other react to/in different situations. We learned the importance of cleaning skillz. 

We learned that without GPS I don't know east to west so he should pay attention to where we are even if I am giving directions. We learned that 120 degrees is a very important temperature. I learned (he doesn't know my thrift store, not buying new stuff addiction yet) we are both cheap, or should I say provident? ;) 

The sad thing is, after learning all this about each other, I don't know if he'll adventure in asking me out again, because who knows if he saw it the same way I did. He did imply negatory on the idea of another date when I said maybe we could still try for the biosphere another time... 

I have no idea what will happen, I leave Tucson in 2 weeks, but I hope he'll be willing to try one more shot at a real date before I go. A date where its he and I laughing at each other and enjoying our time together maybe with white rock in the year 3000? 

If a date doesn't happen though, I'd be a little sad, but I will be thankful I have met a great guy who has helped me to recognize that great (still single) guys who love The Lord and His gospel do exist. Which knowledge is priceless.

And done. 

I like a boy and I think the boy likes me

I know, can you believe it?! haha

I have a date this Saturday with the cute Tyson from my institute class (he is the first guy I have actually flirtaciously given my number too, egads, I know! I put a piece of paper with my number on it in his scriptures before he closed them one day on our way out of class, hehe. Props for going waaaaaaaaaaaaaay out of my comfort zone on that one! No joke, it was tough).

It took a couple weeks for action on said cute mans part, but now we have a date set. We're going to check out the Biosphere2 and the coolness that it entails. I'm making breakfast empanadas for the drive :D I gotta show off my cooking skillz. haha. I'm excited if you can't tell. I really like talking with him, he cracks me up! Hopefully he'll sing on the drive too, because this girl likes that a lot! This is our first official date, but we've done other things together in the past...

Last weekend he and I met with Tyler* and Gina to do some of my families work in the Temple (baptisms and confirmations)... During our drive home that day we had an adventure pulling over and helping a family stuck on the side of the freeway. Good thing the boy speaks Spanish otherwise that would have been a lot more difficult. We've also hung out at Institute activities (yeah, I sucked it up and fought through the awkwardness of the activities to see him, luckily I'm good at meeting new people and not being clingy [ya know to avoid freaking him out about him being the reason I was there and I guess I really do like meeting new people, so it was win win] ;) One thing has been proven with a couple things we have done, we can enjoy each others company for extended periods of time, which is always nice.

Anywho, it's only Wednesday and I have two finals to get ready for tomorrow, but I'm kinda just excited for the weekend to come... maybe it's a good thing I have the finals to focus on for two days huh? lol. Now, back to the grind of my sculpture final. I'll try and write a post after Saturday and update y'all about the boy I like, who might like me.


(*It's kinda funny he and Tyler were home teaching companions when they were in the same ward together so they totally know each other, which tidbit of info I didn't learn about until the drive up to Mesa. I knew they knew each other, I just didn't know how well. We all had a good time together, temple was amazing and pancakes tasty. It's funny to me to be friends and have a history with people that someone who is relatively new in my life has a history with and is friends with too. Makes for fun socializing)